Alien Sea Cucumber
by Cairis Rin
Summary: Meet SG1 from the view point of an alien sea cucumber. First sg1 fic for me.


Author's Note: _This is a little fic I did a while back. I was playing with this toy, annoying my roomies with it, having lots of fun, when my roomie suggested I write a story about the toy...so I did. This story is all from the point of view of my friend, the alien sea cucumber! :D Alien sea cucumber...meet SG1!_

Disclaimer: _Don't own our favorite characters or the SG universe, and I can't say I really know any actual alien sea cucumbers, but I bet if I did I wouldn't own it either. :P_

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'Man, am I bored!' 

My life had never been a complicated one. 

I spend most of my time floating on the surface of waves, letting the currents take me wherever they pleased, talking to others I passed along the way, and taking in the sights. There was a lot to see, and it was my job to see everything the water had to offer. To be honest I just didn't have very much else to do. 

I don't exactly have any control over my body you see. No fins, legs, or even the little furs that many of my friends have for moving about. Instead, I go where the current cares to take me, and right now it had taken me up on the beach with the last bit of tide. 

I sighed. This was going to be a long wait. I'd heard from a passing bird that the tide wouldn't be back for me for some time. Annoyed I'd tried asking the bird to carry me back to the water, but the bird was so high strung it just rattled on about all the things it'd seen and flew away in a gust of excitement. It wasn't fair! I wanted to be out there seeing the sights, too! 

If I could move I'd have tired getting back to the water on my own, or at the very least dug into the sand, the fire star in the sky was drying me out and putting me to sleep. Oh well, not like there was anything to see stuck here as I was. 

Just then a shadow dropped over me and I wondered for a moment if the bird had returned. I looked about, figuratively speaking since I don't actually have eyes to see with, and promptly freaked out, or would have, if I could have. That wasn't a bird!! I didn't know what that was, but it was huge, and was all sorts of funny colors and, what was that? 'What are you doing? Ewww! You're touching me, hehehe...that tickles...hehehe...stop that!' The non-bird thankfully withdrew its...its...well it wasn't like any fin I'd ever seen, wasn't even flat. 

I must let you know, that for all I've seen in my travels in the ocean, I haven't had much experience out of water except for the occasional beaching. So while I was curious about this strange being, I was also quite horrified to realize it was carrying me further from the familiar territory of the waters. 

Before I had a chance to do anything more than lodge an informal protest, to which this stranger was completely ignoring - 'how rude!' - its non-fin was wrapping securely around me and blocking out most of my sight. 

'Uh oh.' 

No one had ever done that before, and I tried reasoning with the stranger for all my hearts worth, but no matter how hard I tried it only continued to ignore me and my plaintive pleas for help. 

After a while its non-fin separated and I could see again as it carried me along. Then it was poking me again with its other non-fin, making the most curious of sounds. 

'Hehehe...'I suppose I would have been too if I could make sounds. 'Hehehe...you really need to stop that!' After a minute it did. Then it did something I completely didn't expect. It was tying me to its non-fin! Well, a part of me at any rate, the long part that usually just got caught on passing things whenever I hitched a ride. 

Why was it doing this? I was already going somewhere, didn't it realize that? The logic of this stranger's action completely befuddled me, that is, until it quite suddenly tossed me into the air. 

'Ahhhhhhh!!!!!! I'm being carried by a maniac! Heeeelllllppppp!!!!' 

Apparently no one was listening. 

As I reached the end of my tether, so to speak, that long bit of my body stretched, still attached to the non-fin as it was, and sprung back towards the creature. My world went flying up and down and then up again with each stretch. 

'Ahhhh!!! What- No- Stop- Ahhhhh!!!! Hey- Will you jus- No- Oh! Hey- That's kinda- Wheeee!!!!' 

It was a bit hard to formulate my thoughts at this point as so many new things came into view, and I suddenly wished each stretch was that little bit further so I could get a better view. Maybe on the next swing. I waited eagerly for the next swing up, but in the next moment the stranger had caught me in his non-fin once again. 

'Hey!' I demanded. 'Why did you stop? I wanted to see!!' 

Obligingly, the stranger tossed me into the air again and I whooped for joy as a million new sights and sensations reverberated around me. I no longer even minded that it was pulling on a part of me, not like it hurt. I don't know what pain feels like actually. Guess it has something to do with me not having any nerves or something. 

Even the motions of the swinging was becoming fun, kind of like riding the waves in a storm. I didn't mind so much that this stranger had picked me up anymore. We continued on our way, the stranger tossing me about as it blew notes through its air hole, and me checking out everything new we passed. 

'What's this? What's that? I'd never seen anything like this in the water!' 

Now all I needed was someone to explain it to me. I'd finally come to the determination that this stranger must just not be able to hear me. It didn't seem like the mean sort of creature, and it _had_ gone to the trouble of giving me so many new experiences, surely it couldn't be that it was ignoring me! 

'Hello!!!! Hello, can you hear me?!!!' 

'Well, that's something new.' 

For a brief moment I thought maybe I'd gotten through, but it was just a little bird watching me as I swung about the stranger's hand. 

'Hello,' I called out to the bird as I hit my high point. 'How are you today?' I'd been taught always to be polite. 

'Hello,' the bird responded, following us a little with curiosity. 'Why are you attached to the human's hand?' 

Human? It that what this stranger was? I waited for another swing up before asking the bird, 'Do you know if humans are friendly?' 

'When they're not hungry, sure,' the bird answered, then trilling with a kind of bird humor flew off back to its tree. 

I thought about that as we traveled on and realized just how little I knew about what I was getting myself into, as if I'd had a choice. What did the bird mean 'when they weren't hungry?' Did humans get hungry often? What did they eat? 

Again I tried projecting these questions to the stranger, but the human didn't respond and I sighed. Jsut then we broke out of the trees into a clearing of rocks and other things. _Many_ other things. I looked around me, all my previous concerns forgotten in my excitement. 

There were even other humans here! 

One of them was crouched over one of the bigger rocks looking at something. "Jack, I'm glad you-" The human began but stopped suddenly as he glanced up from his interest, I tried to see what there was other than the rock but figured I must not be close enough to see it. 

Then I was being caught again in my stranger's non-fin, er, hand, as he responded impatiently. "What is it Daniel?" 

Ah ah! So it does know how to speak! Well, vocally at least. For perhaps the first time in my life I wished I had a mouth. 

"Um, Jack," the one my stranger had called Daniel said with a frown and approached hugging his arms to his chest. "Ah...what is that?" 

"Isn't it neat?" My stranger, Jack, responded with a slight smile and held me out in its open hand. 

'Hello.' I greeted warmly, internally hoping Daniel wasn't hungry. 'So,' I said trying to make nice conversation, 'what were you looking at?' 

Daniel's frown only deepened. "Jack. What is it?" 

'Oh great. He can't hear me, too.' 

But his words attracted the rest of the humans in the clearing, and much to my embarrassment I found myself suddenly the center of attention. I blushed, or tired to anyway. 

"It looks kind of like a sea cucumber," one of the newcomers said. 

Jack just, "Ummed," in response then with a sudden grin said, "Check this out!" 

'Hehehe...stop that! Hehehe!' 

I really couldn't understand Jack's need for tickling me, but it elicited 'ooh's', and 'ahhh's' and suddenly all the humans were doing it. 

"Wow, that's-" Daniel began breathless. I was breathless too, from laughing, or I would have been if I breathed. 

"Cool, uh?" Jack confirmed. 

"Indeed." The largest of the human's rumbled out. 

"I've been playing with him since I found him," Jack told them and demonstrated by tossing me into the air again. 

Yeesh! Couldn't he have at least waited till I'd gotten my breath back?! Again, if I had breath. But it was still rather enjoyable now to swing about on his hand and I really didn't mind it so much, but I was also just as curious to learn everything I could about these humans, and it was bit hard to do that when one is being tossed about. 

"Uh, sir, I'm not sure the sea life might like..." 

The human trailed off uncertain as Jack frowned, but he did catch me again, and I was finally able to get a better, steadier, view of everyone. 

'Thank you,' I automatically replied, even though it had become quite clear to me that none of these humans could hear me. Oh well. 

"Carter," Jack griped. "I'm not sure you can really call this a life form. It's more like a piece of...rubber!" 

'I am too a life form!' I quickly objected, but in the next instant wondered what exactly they meant by life form. That wasn't what they ate, was it? 

Then Carter was picking me out of Jack's hand, turning me over and probing me. Much to my pleasure, her hands were smooth and had a sort of vibrancy to them. I could really get to like these humans I think. "I'm not really sure what it is, sir." 

"What ever it is," Daniel interrupted, "I don't think it wants to be your yo-yo, Jack." 

"You don't know that!" Jack retorted, possessively grabbing me back from Carter. "It's not like I'm hurting him. It's not even a him anyway!" 

"How do _you_ know?" 

Jack didn't answer for a few minutes and finally turned to the blond human and asked, "Carter?" 

Personally, I waited just as eagerly for an answer. No one ever really had explained to me what I was. I just knew I _was_. 

Carter looked uncertainly between the rest and finally down at me. "Well, sir. I suppose we could take it back to the SGC and run a few tests." 

Jack sighed. I sighed. "Fine," Jack said and left the others with me in tow. 

'Tests?' I questioned. 'What tests?' But as usual, no one answered, and much to my dismay Jack undid me from his hand and placed me in something which was placed into yet something else and tucked away where the light didn't reach. 

'Great. Oh, this was just great!' Nervously I waited, but even while I could hear the humans, their voices were muffled and there just plain wasn't anything else to be seen. 

My life, while it hadn't exactly been full of adventures, had never left me so...senseless. 

'Man, was I bored!' 

It was forever and a day before I was moved again, and that had been far far too long for me to be thinking. I'm really a very intelligent being you know, but I'd learned long ago that thinking too much was bad for my health. So, for most of the time I just sat in the dark not thinking, and the rest of the time I wondered about these tests. I didn't even know what a test was, but the mere thought of the word terrified me. 

It was with nervous anticipation that I waited to be taken out into the light again. I had a while to go. And before then, we moved about everywhere, that much I could tell from the way Jack walked, or, at least I assumed it was Jack. The gait was familiar to Jack's at least. 

Then we passed through something. I don't know what, but it near shook me out of my skin, if I had any skin. For a brief moment, I wondered suddenly if I was whole, but in the next instant, whatever it was was fading and I was once again feeling like myself. 

Something else for me to not think about. 

There was a lot more noise here than there had been, and I strained with non-existent ears to try and pick up what was being said. 'Come on!' I cried with frustration. 'Can't you just take me out for a little bit? I want to see!' 

But still as yet, no one could hear me. I listened even harder. 

"Welcome back SG-1." There, another human voice was close from among the mass of noise. 

"Thank you General," Jack replied from right next to me. It must be him who was carrying me. "It was good trip," Jack told the other human. 

'Trip?' 

A thought suddenly stuck me, and I wondered for the first time just how far I was from the water. Was I ever going to get back? 

"Glad to hear it," The General replied, but was then moving too far away for me to make out any more. We were moving again but not too much later I was placed somewhere and left to the dark and silence once more. 

I sighed. Longing deeply to be moving again. A trip? How far had we gone? What was a test? Were the humans hungry now? 

No longer able to keep them away, thoughts plagued me endlessly. I'd never been faced with so many terrifying questions before. 

At long last I was being picked up again and heard Jack and Carter talking above me. "Alright Carter. Time for you to test away." I could feel Jack rummaging around inside the darkness until he caught onto the object I'd been placed into and pulled me out into the light. 

But it wasn't the light of the fire star as I'd expected, but rather other objects, new objects that gave off light similar to the fire star's! Wow...I was staring at the light with so much amazement I almost didn't realize we were moving again until Carter was carefully pulling me out of the see through object I was trapped in and put me into something else. 

Jack had a pained look on his face and said with a small whine. "Just don't hurt him, okay Carter?" 

Yes please, don't hurt me, I echoed plaintively. 

Carter looked up from her scrutiny of me and startled, replied, "I thought you didn't think it was alive, sir?" 

"I don't, but I can't play with it if you cut it to pieces, now can I?" 

Silently I fumed. 'I am too alive! I think.' 

Carter just nodded, and Jack left, abandoning me to these tests. They were beginning to sound worse and worse. 

In the end it wasn't so bad. I became the curiosity of every human that passed by, and for some reason they all felt the need to tickle me. Carter and the rest did a bunch of various things, most of which I didn't even realize were happening, I was too busy looking around. Wow! These human sure lived in a strange environment. 

I think the worse test was when they poked me with something, and I suddenly knew I was loosing a part of me. Not a big part, but a part, and for a while afterwards I felt sincerely violated, but then they started making colorful lights move on this object they were all intent on and I looked on with just as much curiosity. Someone called it a computer I think. 

Okay, so it's hard for me to stay angry for long. I've lived upon the whims of everyone I've come across my whole life, why start getting upset about it now? 

At long last Jack returned, giving me a fond smile as he approached. I smiled back, or I would have if I could have. "Sooo," Jack drawled out. "What the verdict?" 

"It's, uh...rubber." Carter replied, forcibly pulling her eyes from the lights on the computer. "A chemical makeup I've never seen before, but it's still basically rubber, sir," She finally conceded. 

Jack's grin only broadened. "So it's not a life form." 

I still internally bristled at the accusation, but- 

"No, sir." 

"Good." Jack scooped me up with one hand. 

"Sir? What are you going to do with it?" Carter asked, looking a bit jealous, but that was my opinion on the matter. 

"I'm going to keep him," Jack responded and I couldn't help but grin with him. Maybe it was because he was the first human I came across, but I felt a strange likeness for Jack, and I was more than content to travel with this human. He left Carter then and I once more was being attached to his hand. I didn't mind at all, especially after being in the dark and silence for so long. Silently, I hoped Jack would _keep_ me for a long long time. 

I've never traveled outside of the water before, but with Jack, I don't think I'll mind at all. And this way I was bound to see more new things than even I could remember! 

Little did I know how true that thought would become.

End, the

Author's notes 2: _In case you want to see the toy that inspired my little friend, there are pics at the bottom of the page where I've posted the story on my website._


End file.
